Dear Reader,
From the time I've been introduced to the Romance Genre, it's always been historical for me. Something about men in breeches and waistcoats has always been very attractive. And these past few days, my sister and I had been on a marathon of period mini-series and books.
Period men are very sexy. I wonder why men of today can never excite me as much as those from another era. Oh, I know why. It's because, in this age of RTW and instant gratification, it's just too demned expensive to have one's clothes tailored, and one really cannot be bothered by pleasantries. Which is really too bad.
Indulge me on this.
Here, I think, are the things men of today can learn from the men of the past:
1. The Clothes - When I see a man dressed in clothes that fit him so perfectly you know the clothes were made especially for him, I can't help but value him. How can I not value a man who is valuable enough for clothes to be made especially for?
Men most likely find an undressed woman more alluring. But a lot of women, I think, find the dressed men more appealing. We like seeing beautiful things, too. And a well-dressed man is a treat to the eyes, indeed! I do so love seeing a man in clothes that fit, clothes that accentuate the various archs and curves of his physique. And why not? Clothes are not there merely to shelter us from the cold or the heat. From even before, clothes have also been designed to accentuate the various physical assets of the individual. This is still apparent in women's fashion. But for men, I don't think the huge shirts and the baggy pants with crotches coming down to the knees were meant to accentuate any form of physical appeal.
2. The Posture - It's not just what you wear. It's how you carry them.
Another appealing thing about period men is that they have good posture. It's always chin up, chest out, stomach in, and butt out. Very nice. It gives a man the look of confidence and control. And for women, we like a man who is in control.
Men today are more relaxed. I've seen a lot of men who, instead of having their chest out, have their crotches thrust out instead. (See image on the left) I suppose this posture is what today's society considers "cool." But I personally prefer the chest out posture. It makes a woman believe you're not just after getting her into bed.
When sitting down, I still like a man who sits with his back straight, with legs crossed before him. Some people may think it looks stiff, but a man seems more in control this way than when he is all over the place.
I suppose this is just my personal preference. But a man who is too relaxed with his posture strikes me as a man with a come-what-may attitude. And when life throws its storms, I prefer a man who looks like he could stand his ground and weather the storm out over a man who seems like he'd rather get swept away and go where the wind takes him.
3. Chivalry - When a man turns a blind eye to a woman in distress, he's not a man.
I had a colleague once who told me proudly that he never gives his seat to a woman in the train. There was a women's car in the trains now. And if women still go to the mixed area of the train thinking they could get a seat from the men, well they're very much mistaken.
He was a major turn-off.
My advice to the men, especially the young men, give your seats to the women you see on the train no matter what you think their reason for being in the mixed section of the train is.
When people offer me their seat on the train, it makes my day. I make sure I smile at them and thank them because I felt special because of their gesture. What's surprising is that it's actually people from the lower class who give you their seat. You'd think they were the ones who didn't know etiquette, and yet they are more of a gentleman than the people from the higher class.
Another thing men nowadays seem to forget is respect. I had a suitor a few years ago who liked to take me to nice restaurants and nice places. But when I told him something and he didn't believe me, he would say B*S* or he would playfully lightly hit me on the head. Don't. A gentleman would not touch a girl unless she allows him, and he doesn't curse in front of a girl.
Also another point, and my father pointed this out himself. A lot of men nowadays don't care much about a woman's keeping her virtue. My father went out with a lot of girls when he was younger but he never slept with any of them, even if the girl was willing or even if she was the one doing the advance. His reason, he said, was he respected the women he dated. And if a man truly did respect a woman, he would not do anything that might cause her problems or might defile her. It is a man's job to take care of a woman, and not to take advantage of her.
And so, my good Reader, here ends this entry of this seemingly severe author. I may have my Pride and Prejudices, but I assure you, my Sense and Sensibilities are intact. And though I might have to wait a while, I shall wait for my Darcy, Thornton, or Percy. And know, dear Reader that I will be,
Very sincerely yours,
Mary Philips
